How direct are the Dutch when turning someone down?
Wat zeg je als jij niet verliefd bent?
A2 Dutch listening practice · Dutch · Picked for people who know a little
In Dutch dating, the gentle no doesn’t really exist. The standard advice, given to teens with a straight face: gewoon eerlijk zeggen, ik vind jou niet leuk op die manier (“just say it honestly, I don’t like you that way”). No “I’m flattered, but,” no “you’re amazing, however,” just the data. The cultural rule is eerlijkheid duurt het langst (“honesty lasts longest”), even when it stings. Foreigners moving to the Netherlands take about a year to recalibrate.
In this NPO Zapp clip, a kid is asked, “What do you say if you don’t like them back?” The answer comes back instantly: “gewoon eerlijk zeggen denk ik.” Said like it’s obvious.
How common are the words?
How common are the words in this A2 Dutch listening practice video?
How common in written Dutch
How common in spoken Dutch
Harder words in this video
These words are harder than A2. Here is what they mean.
Source: wordfreq 3.1.1 (general) · SUBTLEX-NL 2014 (spoken). These numbers are close, not perfect.
- ▸In foreigner-in-the-Netherlands columns and culture-shock memoirs (DutchReview, I amsterdam, Iamexpat)
- ▸In Dutch dating-advice content (Linda, J/M Ouders, Lopend Vuur)
- ▸In Dutch reality dating shows that lean into directheid (*Boer Zoekt Vrouw, B&B Vol Liefde*)
- ▸In Dutch broadsheets on national identity and bluntness (NRC, De Volkskrant, Trouw)